Practically everyday you hear the same question from women who have recently suffered a breakup. They want to know why the breakup is not affecting their ex boyfriend in the same way it is affecting them. It can be heartbreaking and puzzling to hear of your ex out having fun and yet all you want to do is it alone and cry. Of course you are told that men and women may not be emotionally wired the same, but that might not entirely answer your question.
All of this talk you are hearing about what a great time your ex boyfriend is having, is because it only comes from the ones who don’t see him later when he is sitting in his room staring into empty space. In truth your ex boyfriend is feeling the same pain of loss and failure that you are feeling. He thinks about the good times with you and wonders why everything went wrong. But you will never get him to admit those feelings.
Boys and girls are raised to express their emotions in a different way. your ex boyfriend probably played sports and he was taught not to let the other side know if they had hurt him. But, being a girl, you were taught to express your emotions. If you were hurt or upset, it was alright for you to let the whole world know how you felt. These instincts are so strong that your ex boyfriend will never let you know how torn apart he is inside.
This would make getting your ex boyfriend back a much simpler task if you could always be sure of this. But unfortunately some guys are players and bounce from one woman to the next without any regard to your feelings when he dumps you. Which means that no matter how your ex conducts himself in public, you can’t be sure how he really feels about you.
Because of this uncertainty, you can’t just wait around for your ex boyfriend to make up his mind whether he wants you back or not. You have to be in control of your own life and make your own happiness. In fact the best way to make your ex decide if he wants a life with you, is to show him you can have a good life without him. If he really loves you, seeing you moving on will cause him to see how empty his life is without you.
You have to make up your mind that the old relationship has ended. Both of you have a right to live your life in a way that will make you happy and you have a right to love the person you choose. He has already let you go and the best thing for you to do at this time is let your ex boyfriend go also. When some time has passed you both may come to the realization that you should give things another try.
However, if that never happens, your ex boyfriend might never have considered your relationship to be permanent. To him it might have been just another fling and if that was the case, you are better off to move on.